out of the loop

I've been very bad about posting to my blog. This past week has been a tough one for me. I just wasn't feeling right is so many ways:

felt fat
felt crappy
muscles hurt
extreme temper tantrums (fuck, shit and goddamn were the words of the week)
extreme tiredness
Murphy's Law was in effect all week

My poor family. I almost caved and started smoking again b/c everything was so bad/wrong.... you name it. Anyhow I ended up getting my period 5 days early and I am hoping that is what made me crazy this week. I actually ate an entire bag of potato chips yesterday. (one of the big bags!!!) Sometimes my cycle affects me in weird ways. This was just a very bad cycle. I hope the above is over for good. Especially the Murphy's Law portion of it.

I need to run today/tonight. I skipped the gym this morning b/c that is not what I need. I do not need a treadmill going to nowhere. I need to feel the road under my feet, smell the crisp cool air and feel the breeze against my body. I need Mother Nature, not machines. I need to run. I can not wait to get out there. I hope this is a good run. If not I will make it a good run.

I have a race on Sunday for breast cancer research. I hope that goes well and my body holds up. I'm looking forward to a good trail run on Monday also. All in all a pretty sucky/boring week. Just not feeling like myself.